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LHC offline for 2010, also bringing down other particle accelerators

We were pleased to hear the inevitable black hole creation looks like it’s on hold another year. The CERN LHC is going to be under maintenance for 2012 and it looks like its going to put all the other accelerators out of action for this time aswell! (link) This is great news for you, our valuable customers (and our R&D team!). You can look forward to some new models coming out later this year, including a new super sized bunker and a more powerful personal lines models!

New Linear Atom smasher -Link-

The new machine will be a straight-line tunnel, 31km long, and will use super-conducting magnets to accelerate electrons and positrons, their antimatter equivalents, towards each other at close to the speed of light.

LHC might actually cause black holes (well duh) -Link-

Now a computer model shows conclusively for the first time that a particle collision really can make a black hole.

LHC Down AGAIN -Link-

We ourselves find it hard not to suspect the involvement of some pan-dimensional police force, seeking to prevent humanity acquiring parallel-universe portal capability before we’re ready to use it responsibly.

The LHC hits one trillion electron volts -Link-

The LHC pushed the energy of its particle beams beyond one trillion electron volts, making it the world’s highest-energy particle accelerator. ”

LHC coming back online, currently operating at colder than deep space -Link-

“All eight sectors of the LHC have now been cooled to their operating temperature of 1.9 kelvin (-271C; -456F) – colder than deep space. Officials now plan to circulate a beam around the LHC in the second half of November. Engineers will then aim to smash low-intensity beams together, giving scientists their first data. ”
Even the Universe doesnt want the LHC to work -Link-

“I’m talking about the notion that the troubled collider is being sabotaged by its own future. A pair of otherwise distinguished physicists have suggested that the hypothesized Higgs boson, which physicists hope to produce with the collider, might be so abhorrent to
nature that its creation would ripple backward through time and stop he collider before it could make one, like a time traveler who goes back in time to kill his grandfather.”

 

A LHC Scientist Terrorist has been Arrested in France -Link-The European Organization for Nuclear Research, also known by the French acronym CERN, said French officials arrested the man on Thursday in south-east France for suspected al-Qaeda links.

LHC Webcams at CERN -Link-

Keep an eye on the LHC, look closely and you can see how unstable it is!

Status updates of the Black Hole End-of-the-world Event -Link–

Wikipedia article including test dates: -Link-

CERN Press Release advising the start up date: -Link-

CERN has today announced that the first attempt to circulate a beam in the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) will be made on 10 September.

CERN under legal pressure from the federal government:-Link-

The builders of the world’s biggest particle collider are being sued in federal court over fears that the experiment might create globe-gobbling black holes or never-before-seen strains of matter that would destroy the planet.

CERN mistake causes explosion -Link-

The mistakes led to an explosion deep in the tunnel at the Cern particle accelerator complex near Geneva in Switzerland. It lifted a 20-ton magnet off its mountings, filling a tunnel with helium gas and forcing an evacuation.

LHC Full Documentation -Link-

Want to read every single technical detail of the design and construction of the Large Hadron Collider and its six detectors?  The whole shebang–seven reports totalling 1600 pages, with contributions from 8000 scientists and engineers–is available here,

Lifeboat Foundation: -Link-

The Lifeboat Foundation is a nonprofit nongovernmental organization dedicated to encouraging scientific advancements while helping humanity survive existential risks and possible misuse of increasingly powerful technologies,including genetic engineering,nanotechnology, and robotics/AI, as we move towards a technological singularity.